Conversation With My Heart

Did you know, if placed back-to-back, Sweethearts Conversation Hearts would reach one million miles - enough to go back and forth to the moon twice or around the world 40 times?

These are things you learn while consuming a 20 oz bag over the course of just five days.

Yes, I believe I've made myself diabetic.

That's not even the really sad thing. (Let me preface this by saying I debated long and hard whether to post this, fearing it may sound too pathetic.) The other night, deep in a sugar-induced stupor, and feeling a bit melancholy, I found myself reaching out to my late ex ... and asking for a sign from the beyond. A sign that he was still around. Watching over us. Watching over his daughter.

So, curled up on the couch with aforementioned bag, I told myself maybe he would speak to me through the hearts. I dove my hand in and pulled out the first.

Miss You.

I lost it.

Heart after heart, I convinced myself he was sending me a message. I smiled through the tears. It didn't matter that, somewhere tucked back in a corner of my psyche, I still remained rational enough to know nearly all the hearts, in fact, would of course give me the words I wanted so desperately to hear.

One I Love.

True Love.

Magic.

Angel.

But I allowed myself to ignore the rational, if only for a short time, and experience the familiar flood of bittersweet emotions that, each time they come, ultimately leave me a little closer to healed.

The real tragedy in his passing a year and a half ago are the words that were left unsaid. Maybe he was speaking to me through a bag of Valentine candy. Crazier things have happened. And I'll never stop believing anything's possible.

Happy International Quirkyalone Day!

YAY!!! If you don't know what a Quirkyalone is, you'll want to visit this site, where International Quirkyalone Day is defined as follows:

"International Quirkyalone Day is a do-it-yourself celebration of romance, friendship, and independent spirit. It's a celebration of all kinds of love: romantic, platonic, familial, and yes, self-love. International Quirkyalone Day is not anti-Valentine's Day. It's NOT a pity party for single people. It's an alternative -- a feel-good alternative to the marketing barrage of Valentine's Day and an antidote to the silicone version of love persented in shows such as Hooking Up and The Bachelor.

Above all, IQD is a celebration of romance, freedom and individuality. It celebrates true romance (as opposed to the fake versions presented to us in reality dating shows), independence, creativity, friendship, and all kinds of love -- including love for yourself. If you are single, International Quirkyalone Day is a call to arms to celebrate the possibilities available to single people today. If you are partnered, IQD is a vital reminder to value yourself and develop your individuality even when in a couple. Couples (especially quirkytogethers, of course) are welcomed to attend. After all, many a partnered person complains about the contrived nature of Valentine's Day.

Quirkyalone Day is based on the ideas in Sasha Cagen's book Quirkyalone: A Manifesto for Uncompromising Romantics. It's an invitation to create a great day for yourself, whatever that means to you (and your partner if you have one and choose to celebrate with him or her). It's a day to celebrate the things you love to do alone and the things you love to do with your friends. Ways to celebrate include: throwing a dinner party, buying yourself new underwear, rearranging your furniture, taking a long walk without your cell phone, exploring a new part of town, organizing a card-making party, trying a new recipe, or coming to or hosting a quirkyalone party."

Sasha Cagan is so my HERO! I read her book a few years ago, and loved it so much, I bought four copies and sent one to each of my best Quirkyalone girlfriends for Valentine's Day last year. Even if you don't fall into the Quirkyalone category, single or not, I'm betting you'll get a kick out of it.

Publishers Weekly says, "Cagen writes, her words echoing with the uplifting message that it's not strange to be single; rather, single is the new norm. Cagen speaks out against dating for the sake of being in a couple and highlights the celebrities who fit and don't fit the quirkyalone mold (Oprah: "of course"; Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks: "[E]nemies of quirkyalones everywhere").

Check out the Quirkyalone site and take the quiz to see if you fall into this category. I can't say it enough -- I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE this whole empowering, validating movement!

Valentine's Day by the Numbers

I love stats. So, to celebrate Valentine's Day and embrace my inner geek, here are some numbers from the U.S. Census Bureau I'm recording for posterity. Someday, I suspect, if it's still around, this list will blow MP's mind (for many reasons) ...

2.2 million
The number of marriages that take place in the United States annually. That breaks down to more than 5,918 a day.

131,826
The number of marriages performed in Nevada during 2006. So many couples tie the knot in the Silver State that it ranked fourth nationally in marriages, even though its total population that year among states was 35th.

25.5 and 27.5
The estimated U.S. median ages at first marriage for women and men, respectively, in 2006. The age for women rose 4.2 years in the last three decades. The age for men at first marriage is up 3.7 years.

56% and 60%
The percentages of American women and men, respectively, who are 18 or older and currently married (includes those who are separated).

71%
Percentage of men and women ages 30 to 34 in 2006 who had been married at some point in their lives—either currently or formerly.

5 million
Number of opposite-sex cohabitating couples who maintained households in 2006. These couples comprised 4.4 percent of all households.

120
Number of single men (i.e., never married, widowed or divorced) who are in their 20s for every 100 single women of the same ages.

34
Number of single men (i.e., never married, widowed, or divorced) age 65 or older for every 100 single women of the same ages.

904
The number of dating service establishments nationwide as of 2002. These establishments, which include Internet dating services, employed nearly 4,300 people and pulled in $489 million in revenues. (I can only imagine how large this number is now ...)

Love Lost (and Found)

12:35 a.m.
There's going to be MAJOR DRAMA in about seven hours if I can't find MP's Disney Princess and Monsters Inc. valentines. God only knows where that kid stashed them ...

1:29 a.m.
Valentines located. Found stuffed in two blank envelopes. Now please excuse me while I write "To My Friend, From MP" 32 times, brush my teeth, and collapse.

Hunchback of a Dame

Yes, I know I have poor posture.

Blame it on the height.

Or the nightly bath routine of a rambunctious preschooler.

So thank you, my anonymous friend, for pointedly placing this in my inbox (and my inbox alone!), and reminding me that a back is a terrible thing to waste. Were it not for you, I may have forgotten to drink my milk at dinner tonight.

It's good to be loved.

The Pancake Princess

February 12, National Pancake Day. AS IN TODAY. Hellooo - how could I not have known about this until this afternoon?!? You realize what this means of course.

Buckle up Baby, Mama's takin' you to IHOP for a free shortstack!

Being the generous daughter I am, I called Grammy and Poppy and offered to take them to dinner. MP sampled all five syrups, and surprised everyone by eating nearly all three of her complimentary pancakes. She actually ate more than I did, which is a first -- I'm chalking it up to a growth spurt. Unbelievably, she even sat in her seat the entire meal.

And topping off a memorable night ... a PRINCESS. What are the chances? Watching MP's face as she studied Miss Montana (yes, the real Miss Montana) serving pancakes in a tiara and apron (with an official pageant photographer in tow, if you can believe it) was priceless. 'Riveted' doesn't begin to describe.

I, myself, was riveted by the pure cheesy goodness of a beauty queen in a pancake house.

You're asking yourself, "can it get any better?"

After a warm bath, a squeaky clean MP and her full tummy crawled into bed and fell instantly, deeply asleep.

IHOP is magic.